Procrastination Kills Great Wedding Speeches


There’s rarely a week that goes by that I don’t get at least two or three calls and emails from best men, fathers of the bride or maids of honor who are a few days out from the wedding and in a complete panic.

And because I’m always booked out in advance, I can’t help them.

The process of creating and delivering your wedding speech should be one of the best experiences of your life. But time pressure ruins everything.

Over the years, I’ve pinpointed the two big reasons wedding speakers procrastinate.

The first reason is fear. Most wedding speeches are awful and the bride, groom and guests are hoping you’re going to be different. You know this, which creates tension and fear. The fact that you have years of thoughts, memories, feelings and experiences about the bride or groom in your heart and head only complicates things because it probably all feels like a blur, right?

And because you’re so close to the bride or groom, it’s nearly impossible for you to step back, get perspective, make sense of it all and pull out the essentials for this speech.

Then there’s the fear of public speaking we all feel. As comedian Jerry Seinfeld so eloquently put it:

"According to most studies, people's number one fear is public speaking. Number two is death... Does that sound right? This means... if you go to a funeral, you're better off in the casket than doing the eulogy."

So this fear of public speaking often causes people to procrastinate and put off the speech because it’s too nerve wracking to think about having to stand up in front of hundreds of people and speak.

But it’s a big mistake to put it off.

The only way to crush nervousness is to confront the fear head on by starting your speech so you can relax and do it right without any time pressure whatsoever.

The second reason wedding speakers procrastinate is emotion.

A father will often put off a speech to avoid the realization that his daughter is “all grown up” or “flying the nest.”

And you don’t have to be related to the bride or groom to have similar feelings of your friend moving on in life, often away from you.

The truth is, your wedding speech is an opportunity to sort through and make sense of your emotions and set a positive course for your relationship with the bride or groom going forward. You’ll actually feel better going through the process of sorting your thoughts and feelings.

So whether it’s fear, emotion or a combination, don’t fool yourself into thinking this speech is going to go away. Confront it head-on and make this one of the best experiences of your life. I’ll show you how.

Get started now and relax.